Things I could do…

… if we weren’t planning a wedding:

• Go out to eat on a whim instead of vigilantly watching our spending due to all the (completely awesome) things I want at our wedding.
• Go eat lobster + mascarpone tots at R Gang on a whim instead of living in fear of not fitting into the wedding dress I’ve ordered.
• Spend more time posting and organizing photos instead of using my evenings to get beat up by Jillian Michaels.
• Stop wondering why a gold chiavari chair costs twice as much as the wood colored one (we’re not getting chiavari chairs – they are crazy expensive).
• De-stress about the fact that I have three submittal deadlines on or around our wedding and/or honeymoon.
• Eat more pie.  Have you seen the fat content on a crumb-topped pie?  It’s crazy.  I can see each morsel of butter molding itself to my hips.

Don’t mind me.  I’m just venting because I want to be lazy and not plan dinners at home every night.  When I see a post about lobster tots or tasty pizza or chocolate mousse, I want to just go eat it, not calculate in my head how many hours on the treadmill I’ll have to spend to work it off.  Or how much longer it will take to pay down our credit card for every dinner we spend out.  I mean, I like cooking dinner.  I know it’s healthier, it’s usually pretty good, and having leftovers for lunch is pretty convenient.

And I know it doesn’t matter what size I am when we get married.  Believe me, it’s not like I’m aiming to be stick thin (ha ha ha! can you imagine how many more tasty foods I’d have to give up with that goal?)  I’m just really, really scared I’ll go to my first fitting and the dress won’t zip up (curses non-corset dress!) and the seamstress will say there’s absolutely no way to let it out (I know, I know… it’ll probably be okay).  And then I’ll have to go on some crazy juice detox (that “experts” say won’t work anyway) and eat celery for a month.  I also don’t want to give the impression that I make myself eat salads every day.  I don’t even like salad.  And, weekends are fair game, as are nights out with friends.  Which, I guess, is why I work so hard during the week to make healthy meals and sweat my butt off.  I’m just whining, is all.

I certainly don’t regret planning this wedding.  I’m looking forward to seeing all our people coming together for this.  And I love how they’re so excited to come see us.  But man, this is hard work!  Not to mention all the little projects we’ve planned for the house and backyard so it’s nice and presentable for the post-wedding brunch.  There’s just a lot to do and sometimes it gets overwhelming and it’s not even stuff I could pass off if I wanted (although, I do appreciate Cami helping me unwrap and put together almost 100 LED candles and votives).  But, it’s fine.  As long as I get to complain now and then, I’ll be fine.