detoxing

I hate testimonials.  On infomercials, on diet product websites, in books, and even on Amazon.com.  There are so many wacky methods out there that that you don’t know which ones really work, how well they really work, and if the people who lost 50 pounds immediately gained back 45 of those pounds the next week.  When people rave about something so blatantly, I feel like there’s something they’re not telling me.  Like, in order for the diet pills to work, they actually ate nothing but sesame seeds for a month.

I’ve tested the South Beach Diet (I was so grumpy after 2 weeks I quit and ate a sandwich to celebrate), my mom’s done Atkins and SlimFast, we trained to run a 10k (and did), we try to eat well and bought an elliptical machine.  I’ll try Hydroxycut, but this detox will be first to see if we actually feel “cleaner” and if it drops any weight.  And if the weight stays off.

Yes, we’re going to test out a detox.  Not that stupid Lemonade Diet where you drink nothing but lemon juice, cayenne pepper, and maple syrup – no, I don’t think all your essential nutrients are provided by maple syrup – but a detox program based loosely on the book 21 Pounds in 21 Days.  28 Cooks did a detox based on this and she was happy with the results. 

First, I read the book.  It’s good in theory, but the book is kind of useless.  You don’t really need to buy it.  The website for the detox is also kind of useless unless you want to pay a bunch of money.  All you need is the last chapter of the book or so.  Most of it is searchable on Amazon.com.  Also, hardcore people do the colonics and deep cleanses; real people think it’s icky.  We’re doing this the real people way.

Second, if you do want to do this and think it’s easier to pay $200 for one package, please don’t.  It’s not like the products have been specially-formulated and concocted just for this detox program.  The products are all from Garden Greens (BerrySplash, VegeSplash, Essential Greens, Inner Cleanse, even the Protein Shake) and you can buy them everywhere.  I found all products except the Inner Cleanse at Henry’s, so I imagine you can buy them at Whole Foods.  Or GNC.  Or online.  Even at Amazon.com.  I’d put them on a page for you, but Amazon.com isn’t actually the best price.  Start with local health food stores and then order online if you can’t find them.

What will you learn here?  Obviously, I’ll let you know how we feel, how long we put up with it, and if we lost weight.  The program calls for a berry drink, a green drink, vegetable juice, more green drink, more berry drink, and soup and broth.  No chewing.  There is also an herbal cleanse with pills and fiber, so you bet I’ll be telling you if it’s a scary process. 

Do the drinks taste good?  Is it a pain to keep up with the program during a normal day?  Do you go crazy with cravings for something non-liquid?

Wait and see.  Anything you want to know, I’ll tell you. 

We start Sunday, September 16, 2007.  We’d do it Saturday, but we have Poway Days to celebrate and a pancake breakfast that I already bought tickets for from the Lions Club.

I don’t think I’ll put up posts throughout the process, but I will put all my thoughts onto a separate Page.  We start for 2 days, but I’ll go as long as I can stand it.  Wish us luck.